Saturday, April 01, 2006

From Bakersfield to Fresno and everywhere in between [BFD 2 Fresno]

BFD to Fresno

In memory of Buck Owens.

As I wrote when I posted an earlier version of BFD 2 Fresno, it's oh-so-loosely based on a couple weeks I spent in the summer after my first year of college, camping in the Sequoias.

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The friends I went up with missed the action in the city and went home early. I stayed in the nearly deserted camp by myself. After a few days I got a little bored and decided to hitch up to Yosemite, which would require going down the mountain to the highway and traveling north a ways, and then back up the mountain. I got a ride part way down to the central valley and ended up stranded for about four hours on the poorly traveled highway.

Some hippies in a van stopped going up the mountain and made me take a can of soda. The sun went behind the steep canyon walls and shadows began creeping forward. The only traffic seemed to be going up -- and there wasn't much of it. Maybe a car every 5 or 10 minutes.

I made a strategic decision to go take the first car going either direction and ended up back in Sequoia at the main campground. I hurried to the camp store, catching it only a few minutes before its early evening closing.

There were a few people in the tiny store, 4 pretty college age girls came in and I ended up in line. I overheard one of them say something about Yosemite.

As much out of desperation as anything, I said, "Excuse me, I couldn't help but overhear. I wouldn't normally ask -- but I just spent 4 hours stuck halfway down the mountain, trying to get to Yosemite. If I could catch a ride with you guys, I'd be happy to chip in on the gasoline."

To my amazement, they said yes. They were, indeed, all college girls, from Palo Alto. I ended up traveling with them for another week or so, going from the crowded Yosemite valley up to a nearly deserted campground in Tuolumne Meadows.

The girls showered me with attention the first couple of days. I flirted shamelessly with all of them, trying to decide, which one?

But the thing about four very attractive girls in a VW van -- even in a nearly deserted high mountain campground -- guys come out of nowhere.

And they did, almost literally. Word spread among the backpackers and to other remote camps and trailheads. Hippies who'd been living in the mountains for months began filtering down from the backpacking trails. People who hadn't camped in an official campground since they were kids as a point of honor were making camp around us.

I remember one particularly wild looking hippy with a mane of curly hair and dark, angry eyes filling his canteen at the spring driven spigot in the middle of camp. "I can't believe I'm getting water out of a faucet. I'm used to getting my water right out of the creek. This is just too weird."

When we got to camp, there was only one other party in the campground, a couple in a pup tent. But within 3 days of our arrival, there were 13 men, including myself, staying in camp, in the vicinity of the girl's VW and large centerpole tent. It was like a little village.

Needless, perhaps, to say, I missed my chance not just with my first choice, but with all the girls, the Fates, I'm sure giving me a dope slap for my cocky sureness at the beginning of my adventure with the girls.

Eventually, I caught a ride down into the valley and then to Fresno.

But when I got to the northern edge of Fresno, my luck changed. I walked backwards through Fresno, finally catching a ride in the late afternoon at the southern edge of town with a fellow driving a semi tractor with no trailer.

He explained he was finishing working 13 days straight, 18 hour days and was, he said, "crashing" -- coming off whites, amphetamine. He said he didn't want to take any more because he wanted to get some sleep when he finally got home.

But he almost didn't get home. Going through the grapevine (the mountain pass road between Bakersfield and LA, famous for its nasty weather and heavy winds) he began dozing at the wheel. I yelled over the noise of the engine as the tractor veered across lanes. Trucks going the other direction honked and flashed their headlamps.

As we veered across four lanes I grabbed the wheel, screaming above the noise. He came awake and took control of the wheel.

We repeated that a few times, risking our own lives and many on the freeway below us before I finally convinced him to pull over and get something to eat and a cup of coffee. Once he had a little food in him -- and a Pepsi, since he was still insistent that he needed to get some sleep and a coffee would keep him awake -- we were able to get down the mountain without any further incidents and he dropped me off at the house of some friends in Woodland Hills, in the San Fernando Valley.


Now, that might sound romantic in some perverse way, but then there were the rides with drunk hot rodders or trolling weirdos ("Feel my muscle, just go ahead and feel how weak I am... somebody could just take my money form me, I'm so weak. No, really, feel my muscle!" -- I had that guy let me out on the side of the freeway, screw waiting to get to an offramp.)

This is one topic where I don't have any hesitation at all in saying: Yes, I did hitch, and that's why I'm saying this to you: Just don't do it.

Really.

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BFD 2 Fresno

I know you wonder
how I'll ever get along
What will the lost boy do
now the smart girl's gone?
I haven't seen the world
but there's one that I know
You were just a short short ride
on a long long road...

First time I saw you
didn't know what to do
I tried to catch your eye
but you just came barreling through
all the boys scattered
and the sparks began to fly
I just stood there
you fillin' up my mind

I know you wonder how I'll ever get along...

Don't know why you chose me
Guess I thought that it was just fate
The door swung open
I threw my old life away
my hometown in your rearview
my feet on your daddy's dashboard
Didn't take long til I saw
just what I was for

I know you wonder how I'll ever get along...

From Bakersfield back to to Fresno
and everywhere in between
Everything was wrong
and it was all because of me
At the bottom of the hill I said
"here will l be fine"
Last time I saw you
you was just another grape on the vine

I know you wonder
how I'll ever get along
What will the lost boy do
now the smart girl's gone?
I haven't seen the world
but there's one that I know
You were just a short short ride
on a long long road...

(C)1997, TK Major





Friday, March 31, 2006

Turn your dimmer way down low...

Turn your dimmer way down low...

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Wake up baby, turn your
dimmer lights down low
When it gets yellow like this it hurts my
eyes -- but it eases my soul

Come here baby pay those
monkeys in the shadows no mind
Those monkeys are my demons -- they been
waitin' for me such a long time

I been down -- but it
never looked like up to me

I been down but I guess
down isn't what it used to be

Thursday, March 30, 2006

She couldn't keep from cheatin' -- she never did stop lying [Baby Was a Friend of Mine]

Baby was a friend of mine...

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Baby Was a Friend of Mine

the first time I saw her
I knew it was too late
a shadow fell across my soul
I asked her for a date

Baby was a pistol
way too hot to hold
baby was a big mistake
some things you cant be told

but baby
was a friend of mine
baby was a friend of mine
she couldn't keep from cheating
she never did stop lying
but baby was a friend of mine


Now, Baby drove me crazy
for almost seven years
then she drove away one day
with a repo-man from Sears

I found her in a Motel Six
out in San Berdoo
she was watching Lucy re-runs
and sniffing airplane glue

but baby
was a friend of mine...


Now the last time I saw her
she said that it was fate
I thought for sure you'd save me
(she) said as she turned away

I thought i saw a tear
slide across her face
I thought I saw forever
just as it slipped away

but baby
was a friend of mine
baby was a friend of mine
she couldn't keep from cheating
she never did stop lying
but baby was a friend of mine

(C)1992, TK Major

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

A betrayal of Biblical proportions [Burning and Bitter]

Burning and bitter

It's all in the backstory, babe.

You'd think this song was about a betrayal of Biblical proportions, a temptress so demonic, yet so enticing as to destroy any fool with the temerity to cast a glance her way.

But as I pointed out when I posted a much different (and essentially somewhat silly) version back on December 4th, the young woman I had recently broken up with when I wrote this song was a sweet and level-headed mother of two young girls who simply wanted me to decide what I wanted. When I wouldn't -- or couldn't -- give her an answer, she moved on.

But I was a dumb ass kid, a few years younger than her, a crummy job but big dreams of adventure. The last thing on earth I thought I wanted was responsibility.

Story of my life.


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Burning and Bitter

Burning and bitter
are my thoughts tonight
I can taste the poison
of the lies I heard tonight
I have seen my soul
like the falcon
you gunned down in flight
You're a sorceress
you're a temptress
but you're oh
so sweet in the night

(C)1975 TK Major

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I gave up forever... I gave up tomorrow for good [Scrapin' the Bottom of Yesterday's Bucket Again]

Scrapin' the Bottom of Yesterday's Barrel, Again

I gave up forever
I gave up tomorrow for good
I gave up thinkin' I could
pull it together
I never could


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Scrapin' the Bottom of Yesterday's Bucket Again

Well I'm scraping the bottom
of yesterday's bucket again
I wore out my memories
and then I just played them to shreds
I'll spend my tomorrows
my head bent in sorrow
my heart torn with pain and regret
And all the same
it's my same old refrain:
I swear I won't
begin again

and everyone says
just put it to bed
it all worked out for the best
but how could they know
that I love you so
and I won't stop til I'm dead

I gave up forever
I gave up tomorrow for good
I gave up thinkin' I could
pull it together
I never could

I gave up on new love
I gave up on hope
I gave up on faith
but never on ghosts
And I gave up thinkin'
I could ever begin again
I won't begin again

(C)2000, TK Major

Monday, March 27, 2006

Nothing means nothing anymore... except those kids [JoZynn]

XXXXX

3 little babies down on the floor

2 scared 2 cry
1 thing for sure
Nothing means nothing anymore
except those kids

My use of the phrase "Nothing means nothing anymore" is a tribute to the great early LA punk songwriter Randy Stodola, of the Alleycats.

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Jozynn Jozynn

Jozynn Jozynn
Jozynn Jozynn
look at the mess that you're leaving me in
Jozynn Jozynn

Jozynn Jozynn
all is forgiven
come back again

3 little babies down on the floor
2 scared 2 cry
1 thing for sure
Nothing means nothing anymore
except those kids
Jozynn Jozynn

Jozynn Jozynn...

All this time you been away
it's nothing to me
it's just be a day
if you just come back again
Jozynn

Jozynn Jozynn...

3 lonely kids
1 angry man
2 hurt 2 cry
for God's sake woman there's
a million things
you'll never understand
Jozynn Jozynn

Jozynn Jozynn
Jozynn Jozynn
look at the mess that you're leaving me in
Jozynn Jozynn

(C)1996, TK Major



Sunday, March 26, 2006

Battle of the Sexes Explainer

Men Are Still Stupid

Sometimes a suddenly evident truth just reaches out, knocks you over the head and drags you to its cave.

You know, something you've really always known.

It was an August night in 1990 and my next door neighbor and I were sitting in her kitchen, which opened on my backyard, talking, as we often did, since we'd known each other for years, about our friends and about life in general.

Most of our mutual friends were then in their 20s or 30s, many of them musicians or other artists, and there was plenty of turmoil, of all varieties, not the least of it romantic and/or sexual.

I've forgotten what exactly, what scandal, what dilemna, what intricate arrangement, we were talking about, but I remember a few moments of silence, standing up, and saying, "Well... men are stupid. Women are crazy. It's a system. It's the way it's always been... "

[reprinted from the posting of an earlier version of this song, which was such a rotten version it shall not be mentioned again]


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MEN ARE STILL STUPID

When I was just a little bitty boy
sitting on my pappy's knee
he said hey TK listen to my story
take the word from me
dont let a girl get you in trouble
spend all your money make you see double
take this tip from your dad
don't fooled and dont get had

I said hey dad huh dont worry so bad
times have changed and that stuff's in the past
and then he rolled his eyes and he slapped his thigh
and he fell over laughing as he grabbed his sides
times ain't changed since the early days
men are still stupid and women are still crazy


When I was older growing up
not quite a man but not still a pup
I asked my mama for some love advice
and she put down her slide rule and she picked up some dice
she rolled a seven then he rolled 2 ones
she said snakeyes sonny youre just like everyone (because)
times aint changed since the early days
men are still stupid and women are still crazy


Now Caesar he told Cleopatra
I know baby just what youre after
you think your loves gonna wear me down
she said julie baby ya got it turned around
You think my loves some palace plot
but I dont even know what I want
cause times aint change since the very first day
men are still stupid anw women are crazy

1990-08-02
(C)2006, TK Major