I’ve known a lot of bums who claimed to have been somebody, once. And, for sure, some of them were just high. But after some living, I began to see that sometimes you need a little altitude before your fall to really get going. Gravity being the way it is, you just fall faster and faster the farther you fall. (Wind resistance notwithstanding — and, hey, can’t you see we’re trying to be metaphorical, here?)
The guy in the song below used to be somebody once. That’s who he is now. A guy who used to be somebody once. Or he thinks he was. And, really, that’s what counts.
looking for my place in the sun
ah but everything is almost gone
a bottle in a bag and a bun
now all I need is the sun
caviar and champagne are fun
limos and callgirls, the run
but those cocaine days are done
now all I need is the sun
kingdoms and palaces galore
yachts and planes for sure
diamonds and oilfields and mines
yet I traded them all for this wine
caviar and champagne are fun…
I’ve spent a thousand times what you’ll ever own
I had twenty people answerin’ my phone
You– you’d never get through… yet now
here I am drinkin’ with you
caviar and champagne are fun
limos and callgirls the run
but those cocaine days are done
now all I need is the sun
I’m at that point in my life when I’m mostly beyond being afraid for myself, but like anyone, I have my moments of darkness and doubt.
When things are darkest… I count my blessings.
It’s a tactic that not only dovetails nicely with my innate perversity, but which has served me well over the years. As I mentioned in a previous post, 25 years ago (last month) I was hit by an inattentive driver while riding my motorcycle and ended up in the hospital for 2 months (most of that in traction) with an “exploded” hip, a smashed femur, and a shattered ankle.
They pieced me back together (my ex-rays look like I was attacked by the contents of a hardware store), but there were some tough times along the way, I was on crutches for 6 months and a cane for 5 years. (Turned out I was walking on a leg that was still broken. Long story that reinforces the importance of second opinions, which I discovered late.)
Anyhow, the thing is, when things got tough, as they occasionally did, I counted my blessings. (I used to feel bitter that I didn’t have any shoes until I saw a man who didn’t have any feet. You know?)
I also drank… I’d say ‘but that’s another story’ — but it’s actually this story, or more properly the story of this song.
At any rate, here’s a guy who, I’m thinking, is living in that tiny postage-stamp sized bit of grace afforded those with little left to lose…
These lyrics were originally written as a sort of rap to go with music from Brit techno whizkid Deakin Scott but, while Deakin and I collaborated more or less successfully on an earlier track (the lyrics for which are my “Mountains Come, Mountains Go”) the track these were written for never came together and I finally sat down with my acoustic guitar a few months later and came up, more or less, with these chords.
I say ‘more or less’ because I actually had all but forgotten this song and before yesterday and had quite likely not played it twice since 1999. A shame, since I really like it. It’s not the first song I’ve written or track I’ve recorded in a ‘creative phase’ that’s gone forgotten for a long period after the arc of sometimes fevered productivity has passed.
All I Need Is the Sun
looking for my place in the sun
ah but everything is already gone
a bottle in a bag and a bun
now all I need is the sun
caviar and champagne are fun
limos and callgirls the run
but those cocaine days are done
now all I need is the sun
kingdoms and palaces galore
yachts and planes for sure
diamonds and oilfields and mines
yet I traded them all for this wine
caviar and champagne are fun…
I’ve spent a thousand times what you’ll ever own
I had twenty people answerin’ my phone
You– you’d never get through… yet now
here I am drinkin’ with you
caviar and champagne are fun
limos and callgirls the run
but those cocaine days are done
now all I need is the sun
Okay… as promised, here’s a song that recombines verses from yesterday’s Blue Recollection with a similarly themed set of lyrics.
(And there’s yet another song that incorporates some of the lyrics from this song — but it won’t likely be in AYoS because of a significant f-word problem — it’s in the title, it’s in the chorus. Mumbling won’t help. But, anyhow, that one’s a love song.)
ANOTHER DEAD SOLDIER (IN THE WAR ON ALCOHOL)
Woke up this morning
wondering about last night
kinda think I coulda took some drink
but my memory just don’t serve me right
Now the last thing I remember
You were walking out the door
My hand reached for the bottle
and then there ain’t no more
Just another dead soldier
in the war on alcohol
put him with his brothers
line ’em up against the wall
Just another dead soldier
in my war on alcohol
I won’t be satisfied
til I’ve killed them all
I lay awake at night, baby
but it ain’t because of you
I’m just listening to the plaster crack
and the clock tick in the next guy’s room
You’re just a blue recollection
but that ain’t nothing new
I’m gonna drown than memory
it’ll be the last thing I do
